MY OPINION ON DIVORCE: Pastor Mrs Tunrayo Funso Babs
Few days ago, precisely March 11th, someone asked for my opinion on divorce. I wanted to answer her immediately but on a second thought I changed my mind and told her I will get back to her.
The topic of divorce has become a grey area and a controversial topic in the Christian Dom. It has generated a lot of arguments in the past and I am sure this might continue until Christ arrival. So I want to recommend discussion and not argument that means you don’t have to agree with my submission on this topic.
Something just happened now and I am sorry to disappoint you all, I just had a mind shift from the virus called divorce to its victims. I choose to bring succour to those who are victims of divorce and help them navigate through this phase while trusting God for their healing. I prefer to speak God’s words that will release those who are bound by religion and tradition of men rather than dwelling so much on the subject of divorce.
Firstly, let me burst some myths about Marriage and torchlight some misconceptions about marriage. Marriage is not a condition for making heaven and marital failure doesn’t mean destiny failure.
There’s no award for best couple or marriage in heaven,so if yours is working be grateful and if yours doesn’t work, divert your energy to your lifetime assignment.
I don’t believe that your destiny is solely dependent on your marital success.
A failed marriage should not take away your sense of worth, purpose, identify and Acceptance or do I need to give you an array of examples of people with failed marriage and a great destiny? Or examples of those who were never married and yet fulfill destiny. Marriage is a team work and it’s success is determined by the two parties not one, so if yours has fallen make sure your destiny doesn’t fail.
I have noticed that 90%of divorcees didn’t plan to have a failed marriage, we have some people who worked so hard to keep their marriage but still the marriage hit the rock and there some who didn’t even pay any sacrifice to keep their home but the truth is that God has a redemptive for both parties, your failure is not final.
God hate divorce as much as I do, God hate sin so do I but that has not stop people from sinning, but it will interest you to know that God did not hate sinner infact he paid the ultimate price for their redemption. The story of the woman caught in adultery explained it all. Let us apply the same principle to divorce, so it will be right for me to say that God hates divorce and not the divorcees and if God can make provisions for sinners he can as well make provisions for the victims of divorce.
We have religious men and women out there, they hated divorce more than God himself. They will rather choose to protect the tradition of marriage than the people inside the marriage and this has destroyed a lot of great destinies. They are ever ready to judge and condemn the victims of divorce, they treat them an outcast, excommunicated them from serving in the Sanctuary and prevented them from partaking in the Lord supper.
Most times it’s not what these divorcees go through that kills them but the interpretation we gives to their experiences it’s better you walk a mile in their shoes before you starts judging them. For most us we can’t even go further in the same shoes.
The society has been hard on you please don’t be too hard on yourself, the man turned your life upside down and left you and they said you pushed him out, your wife left you in the midst of a terrific storm and they said you frustrated her out of the relationship, it’s time to change your garments, you have mourn them enough it’s time to stand up and fight for what you have left. Who says your land can’t be married again? There’s a redemption plan for you.
Marriage is a union of two forgivers and learners who are willing to make adjustments where and when necessary. So to all the singles out there if you are vindictive, marriage is not for you, if you are a perfectionist , marriage is not for you. Marital covenant ensures the elimination of weaknesses.That implies two imperfect people going into relationship.
Don’t go into marriage all in the name of my mates are getting married, marriage is deeper than that, if you rush in you will rush out, don’t close your eyes to caution signal you are getting now only to open it after marriage.There’s is a lot of argument on the subject of divorce and I am sure you don’t want to become a topic.
To those who are married, please fight for your home, it is not safer out there don’t listen to those who are urging you to get out the truth is that some of them are paying higher sacrifice to keep their home. Don’t sign that divorce paper until you have put in your very best otherwise you will just be ending one problem by starting another one, fight for your marriage but not at the expense of your life it is better to engage in such warfare from afar.
To those who had already gone through divorce, free yourself from the shackles of traditional religion, you are not committing any sin if you are considering remarriage, your partner has moved on for years God will not judge or condemn you if you choose to move on just make sure you do it right.
To the society, it high we stopped treating those who are victims of divorce as a second class citizens. Stop judging them, you can’t understand their pain if some of us are under the same circumstances we would have kissed our marriage good bye long time ago. Many of them are stronger than we think they are and some of them are just victims of circumstances and there is hope for them, there’s healing for them. The best we can do for them is to always remember them in our prayers and give them freedom and permission to live again.
This is my Husband (Pst Funsho Babs) words in my handwriting part of my notes on his teachings on Marriage remarriage and divorce.
I am Motunrayo Babs.
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